"i'm your private dancer. . ."

Hello my lovelies!

Long time no blog! 

I’m so sorry about that.  I’ve gotten on that vlog kick, but sometimes some things just sound better in written.  For example, cuhrazy dreams.  Whenever you verbally express a cuhrazy dream to someone, they look at you all cuhrazy-like and the cuhraziness of the dream is lost on the fact that you look and sound cuhrazy.  A cuhrazy dream in written form keeps its cuhraziness and then comes across as funny.  As cuhrazy dreams are meant to.

So, onto last night’s cuhrazy dream!

The dream began with me knowing I’ve had an affair with a married man.  I was in a dark room, of course, and crying because he had left me to go back to his wife, which was ok because I knew he would and she was much prettier than me anyway.  Next thing you know, I’m in a swimsuit with a most epic tan and I’m sitting at the top of a water slide, a water slide that begins at the roof of a very huge house.  His house to be exact.  Why am I at his house?  I’m friends with his adult son, who is older than me so this means the man I’ve been having the affair with is super old.  What, what?!  This dream is turning out to be perfect!  Except his son is trying to drown me on the water slide.  So not cool.  My head is under the water and I can see my tan legs kicking up in the air as I struggle to get away.  Finally he stops and asks me to forgive him, he can’t go through with it.  Next thing ya know I’m being hauled up out of the water by none other than David Bowie!  The man I’ve been having the affair with!  Craziness!!  He tells me he’s left his wife, sorry about his son and I would I run away with him.  Hell to the yeah!  Then I wake up with Private Dancer in my head.  

Am I a slut?  

Done now. . .  :)

PS.  This blog is brought to you by Tina Turner’s Private Dancer.

David Gray in Nashville!

Hello my lovelies!!

It's my first ever concert review in vlog format!  Hope you enjoy. . .it was so much easier than typing it all out,  but I still kinda like having it in print too. . .

"when you came in the air went out. . ."

Hello my lovelies!

Just got done watching True Blood.  My thoughts.

Things I liked about the season 4 premiere of True Blood:

 1.)  Eric.

 2.)  Jason’s goatee.

 3.)  Jason’s shirt sleeves rolled up.

 4.)  Eric.

 5.)  Sookie’s house.  It’s about time, that place was skanky.

 6.)  Bill’s new haircut.

 7.)  Hoyt and Jessica being all couple-y and adorable.

 8.)  Lafayette’s mohawk.

 9.)  Eric in that leather jacket.

10.)  Eric in that uber tight shirt at the end.  *le sigh*

Things that annoyed me about True Blood:

 1.)  Fairies.

 2.)  Bill.

 3.)  Not enough Eric.

 4.)  Fairies. 

 5.)  Bill.

 6.)  Tara’s plot.

 7.)  Fairies.

 8.)  Bill.

 9.)  Have I mentioned fairies and Bill?

10.)  Totally NOT ENOUGH ERIC.

Done now. . .  :)

PS  this blog brought to you by Jace Everett's Bad things.

"stone blind alibi, i will eat the lie. . ."

Hello my lovelies!!!

How is everyone doing tonight???  I’m feeling pretty awesome at the moment. . .being off the last two days has been awesome possum!   Been in the pool everyday this week, except for today too much to do. . .so yeah.  I’m exercising and getting a tan.  Whoop whoop!

At the moment I am gorging on the feast that is David Gray music.  After last night’s live stream from Dublin I’ve just been on a David Gray high today.   This is what usually happens before a concert, no matter who I’m going to see.  I don’t listen to their music for the months leading up to the show, but when it gets down to crunch time I obsess with all of it and then try not to listen to it at all the day of the show. . .which can prove to be very difficult sometimes.  Watching Live In Slow Motion right now. . .this DVD is AWESOME!  My only wish is that he had done Slow Motion for this show. . .that song is beyond amazing live.  Life in Slow Motion is my absolute fav album by DG, I can listen to the entire thing from start to finish. . .well except for Hospital Food.  Don’t ask me why, but I’ve never gotten into that one. . .

What else?  Here’s a video about my new hair and how David Gray kinda sorta influenced it. 

Other things. . .listening to Bowie now.  I started writing this much earlier and now it’s Bowie time!  Ironicness, David Gray talks David Bowie!  Oh be still my beating heart.

Ok.  We were cleaning out Bug’s room today and stashed in her closet was her Easter basket still full of candy!  And there were these VERY MINI Three Musketeer marshmallow chocolates and I totally ate two of ‘em.  And they were so deelish!  I seriously can not even explain to you how yummy they were. . .not having any form of candy since January, it was like Christmas in June!

Good news. . .my feets look like normal feets!  YAYS!  The doctor had told me that they may never return to normal because my blood vessels had stretched so much when I was retaining so much water from my back issues a few months back.  But they are SO normal now!  And my back has been feeling to uber fantastic that I actually gave myself a French pedicure today and I feel so pretty. . .and also happy because now my Goo Goo Dolls tattoo doesn’t look all stretched out. . .lol

I really don’t wanna go to work tomorrow.  *whine*  But I’ve done nothing but get on and off facebook all day today.  Between cleaning, laundry, vlogging, hacking at my hair some more, cutting and coloring my mom’s hair, playing with the Bug it’s been facebook.  I need to step away from the facebook. . .

The Tiffers is coming this weekend and I’ve already told her all the awesome music headbands I wanna make. . .she’s bringing all the glass tiles and Rolling Stones and gonna show me how to make ‘em myself.  Then she’s bringing all the Pokémon she’s made and I’m gonna put ‘em on headbands. . .so Bugglette’s updates coming soon!

I guess that’s all. . .I started typing this out as something to do other than bomb everyone’s news feed with random music videos and now I'm bored of vlogging.

Done now. . .  :)

PS  This blog brought to you by David Gray’s Alibi.

PSS  21 days til I’m drunkenly swaying in the front row for this with my bestie Heather and my fav David Gray hookers!

"no one can believe in things that never change. . ."

Hello my lovelies!!

How are ya’ll on this beautifully hot day (in KY anyway it’s like 90 degrees already and it’s only 11:30)?!?!  I’m feeling pretty awesome at the moment because:

1.)  I slept in my bed until 9:30 this morning!  Whoop whoop!

2.)    John Rzeznik from my Goo had an amazing twitterfest last night, that I did sleep through but woke up eagerly this morning to play catch up with.

a.)    It’s nice to wake up with a twitter text from John Rzeznik and the first line is:  Yo hey hey beautifuls !!!!! 

b.)    Cuz he’s obviously only talking to me right?  Right?!?  That’s what I thought.  LOL

3.)  I'm off today!

4.)  Was thinking about my paycheck this morning and it’s gonna be so awesome because I had a 6 hour day (my very first one in a year!) and I’ve gained 2 other hours this week.  Whoop whoop!  Back don’t fail me now cuz Mandy needs some David Gray money! 

5.)  22 days until Nashville!!!

And in all seriousness, if he sings this song, I am gonna bawl like a baby.  The end.

      

      6.)  And the Bug told me, “For realsies Mandy, I’m not faking.”  Spoken just like her big sister. . .made my heart all warm and fuzzy inside!
   
7.)  Got my birthday prezzies from Sara and Summer, THANK YOU!  My very first lappytop, a $30 gift card to Sephora and so much more. . .totally bought me a Kat Von D pallet. . .hells to the yeah!

Now it’s time for a fairy tale from your Blogmistress Mandy.  Once upon a time there was a chubby girl who had had a crush on a boy every since elementary school.  That’s a lot of years to hold onto a crush, but it happens in fairy tale land.  She never talked to him.  Ever.  Then they graduated and moved on.  And one night Chubby Girl stumbles upon his facebook page.  Thus the facebook stalking begins!  So I, I mean er Chubby Girl, looked at his page last night then had a crazy dream about him. . .he was hanging out at Chubby Girl’s house and helping her clean her room while Chubby Girl was just trying to get the CD player to work.  Music all the time, I promise you this!  Well, Chubby Girl does. . .aw hell, who are we kidding?  We know I’m talking about me!  LOL  So then my phone starts blaring It’s Over by the Goo Goo Dolls at 4:30 in the morning.  Ironic song to interrupt my dream and my long time crush huh?  And it’s one John Rzeznik going twitter crazy until almost 7 am my time.  But I mean, look at his little John Rzeznik face, can you get mad at him?

so much hotness in this pic i don't know where to start!

he has one of the greatest profiles in EVER!

adorableness!

another great profile shot.  yum.

Mandy, is that you?  again?  security!

*sigh*

So yeah. . .that’s about it.

Done now. . .  :)

PS  This blog brought to you by the Goo Goo Dolls It’s Over.

PSS  I cannot even begin to tell you how often I listen to this song. . .I’m talking Strangers When We Meet count (the official itunes count is 289 but we all know that’s a joke!) tripled! 

"tell the repo man and the stars above that you're the one i love. . ."

Hello my lovelies!!

How have ya’ll been?!?!  It’s been awhile I know. . .my bad.  Been vlogging up a storm though so you can check it out here if ya wanna:

FACEBOOK:  http://www.facebook.com/twofatgirls
Blog:  http://thetwofatgirls.blogspot.com/
YouTube:  http://www.youtube.com/user/thetwofatgirls

I’m tellin’ ya I am so insanely tired but every time I try to sleep, it just doesn’t happen.  I always have good intentions of going to bed early but then I end up doing laundry.  I plan on taking a nap when I get home, Bug has other plans. . .like the pool.

I plan on sleeping in. . .well yeah, that hasn’t happened in weeks.  And yes I know I should could be napping right now instead of typing this here random blog, but it’s almost time for the new episode of Doctor Who!

thanks to spoilers i know who River is!

And it’s gonna be epic.  How do I know it’s gonna be epic?  Cuz I read spoilers and I totally should not have.  River always warned of spoilers and I went and did it anyway.  The episode from a couple weeks ago I didn’t really care for. . .probably because the episode about the Tardis the week before made me cry, this one just didn’t live up to my expectations, but for realsies, after I read these spoilers. . .uh yeah.  It’s gonna be E-P-I-C!

What else do I wanna talk about. . .tomorrow I have to work 6 hours!  Oh the agony!  Oh the horror!  Now, I know many of you are probably  like ‘6 hours is cake, I work 14 hour shifts!’  Well I haven’t worked more than 4 hours since oh lets see,  October!  We all know about my uber crappy back and while it is feeling better and I can stand for longer periods of time, albeit I am still crooked, I don’t need to go in the back and lay on top of the washing machine and cry anymore.  I feel practically fantastic.  *knock on wood*  But seriously, I’m scared to work that long tomorrow. . .so yeah.  Just keep me in the back of your mind tomorrow. . .lol

Something else. . .I’m sure ya’ll probably seen on my facebook that I’ve joined Weight Watchers blah, blah, blah.  We’ll I’ve lost over 30 pounds so far and no one has ever recalculated my points.  Well they did my first week, but no one has ever done it again.  So I did it myself the other day and I’ve gone down  3 points and no one told me!  Tiffers was the one who told me recalculate!  So now I keep thinking “I could have been losing more weight if I’d been eating less points!”  I mean, how long have I been eating too many points?!?!?

So while I’m angry that no one told me about this, I am also angry because I’ve lost 3 whole points.  I mean that’s a Fiber One Bar, a bag of popcorn, a 100 calorie pack of Pringles. . .so many things!  But it’s for the greater good so I’m just gonna suck it up and move on. . .

Onto music goodness. . .only 26 more days until I get to see David Gray in Nashville and meet up with all my DG buddies!!!  I am so fuhreakin’ uber crazy excited!!!  It’s been a year (I think) since I’ve heard them beautiful yee-hee’s live and I am so ready!  I mean look at his little David Gray face and imagine him going ‘YEE-HEE!’  LOL

Still gotta find me an uber cute outfit.  And a hotel.  And save up some spending money.  *sigh*  Which means I need to NOT complain about working a 6 hour shift cuz that means more dinero and more tips.  But yeah. . .*whine!*

Done now. . .  :)

PS  This blog brought to you by David Gray’s The One I Love.

PSS  Hells to the yeah!!!!

"you remind me of the babe. . ."

Hello my lovelies!

How is everyone out there in blog land???  It’s been awhile, I hope your doing awesomely!  Me and Tiffers (my sister) have been vlogging like crazy lately and I’ve neglected my blog and I’m sorry.

So, yesterday was my Bug’s birthday and we had her a David Bowie/Labyrinth themed birthday party. . .

(this is the part of the movie her party was based off. . .the ball/dream sequence.)

. . . it’s what she wanted and it came out wonderful if I do say so myself!

I had bought a few decorations at the Peddler’s Mall but to be honest, we really didn’t have to buy much, maybe spent $40, probably less on decorations.  Let me think, we bought streamer, table cloth, decorative rocks and balloons at Dollar Tree and I bought these awesome suckers from Oriental Trading. . .

actually wedding suckers but the color matched perfect and you could put on them whatever you want.

. . .and the masks cost about $10 and we made 13 with plenty of supplies left to make more. 

The boas came from ebay, 3 for $10, cuz at Michael they were $10 a piece!  Uh no.  All the owls and the big Labyrinth poster came from Tiffers,  the little pictures were Bug’s. . .I mean, yeah $40 might be a lot for decorations, but you don’t wanna know what we’ve spent before.

Her cake is another story, it was about to piss me off and I was close to throwing it out the window!  Fondant is a douche.  A complete and utter douche.  That stuff is a pain to work with!  And I was already tired from working, then I had to come home and do the cake, get her decorations up and my mom was there to help (Bug was there to help but mainly got in the way lol) and I get so anal about my parties.  I can’t help it.  No one likes me when it gets down to nitty gritty party time and I’m sorry.  I really am.  But I am a bit OCD and picky about certain things. . .anyway, the cake came out pretty good.  The one thing I was most proud of was the writing, it’s the first time I’ve written on a cake and thank goodness for cake stencils, best investment I’ve made cake decorating wise. . .

Now for some Labyrinth birthday goodies!

Jareth's necklace!

love that smile!

We also got a bouncy house for ‘em and it was so cold and rainy!  Them kiddos froze but it’s like, ‘that  bouncy house was $160, someone better get in it and bounce and you better have a good time!’  And they did, all the kids loved it!  Later me, Tiffers and the Bug got in it, even though everyone freaked out cuz I wanted to and they wouldn’t let me stand up in it, but it was so much uber fun! 

I stayed on my knees the entire time and Tiffers' and Bug’s bouncing made me bounce and let me tell ya, I guess it was just from bracing myself, by my friggin’ thighs hurt so bad!  Fat girls were not meant to bounce like that!  Or at least this fat girl wasn’t. . .and when I got out my knees were so owy and confused they were all jittery, took a bit for them to settle down. . .and standing at work today, my thigh muscles hurt more than my back!  Which is a nice detour of pain so I’m not complaining at all. . .

All in all and I think the part came out pretty good and everyone had a nice time and took plenty of cake home with ‘em!  Weight Watchers does not allow for cake binges so the cake that was left over at the end of the night (which wasn’t much I promise you, I’m talking people went home with a mega plate of cake) went in the trash.  No more temptation!

What else?  I think that’s about it.  I’ll leave you with this.

Done now. . .  :)

PS.  This blog brought to you by David Bowie’s/Labyrinth’s Magic Dance.